ESL Does Occasionally Have Its Disadvantages

Every so often I find a book that is so delicious that I force myself to read it slowly, rationing one chapter every few days so that I delay its inevitable conclusion. My current love is “Mai Pen Rai Means Never Mind” by Carol Hollinger, the American wife of a foreign service worker who spent two years in Thailand in the 60s. It is brilliantly written, full of hilarity and wit that rivals even David Sedaris, whom I worship. If I were still teaching 8th grade language arts, the mileage that I could get out of these essays would be phenomenal—tone, style, voice, satire, cultural awareness, great story-telling—I could create an entire semester course based on this book. I long to share it with my current students who spent their lives in Thailand, but here is how I predict the conversation would go:

Me: So, I just finished this very funny book about Thailand.

Students: Teach-ah, what is ‘just’?

Me: Uh, yesterday. I finished this very funny book yesterday.

Students: Teach-ah, funny?

Me: No, not me. The book. The book is very funny.

Students: Oh, book, funny very very.

Me: Yes, it’s about Thailand.

Students: Teach-ah like Thailand?

Me: Oh yes. But I really like this book. It’s very funny.

Students: Oh, teach-ah like.

And so on. So I savor Hollinger’s writing alone. I might fantasize about teaching it, but the truth is, there aren’t any farting or kissing scenes, so I might be delusional thinking that the middle schoolers would appreciate it anyway.